Now Is the Winter Of My Discontent

I just wanted to let everyone know that I will be going away this weekend to help out with the high school winter camp. Yes, I get to leave our nice weather for a place far more snow-filled. I've never been a huge fan of snow, or cold places in general. The fact that I don't really have any clothing appropriate for snow doesn't help much either. Anyway, I have work to do before we leave at 4pm, so I bid you adieu.

Options

I foresee options ahead of me in my career. The previous 4 weeks I have been teaching a lot. Last Sunday I taught for an hour on the Book of Acts to a more mature audience than I’m used to in high school ministry. I think the youngest person, other than me of course, was in their 40’s and the oldest in their 70’s. When I came in, no one thought I was the teacher. (They probably thought I was there to set up the powerpoint projector or something). I’ve never taught adults for a solid hour before, it was interesting. Maybe the most astounding thing was that the people actually wanted to listen to me. They were giving me their undivided attention, meanwhile I’m used to high schoolers who are text messaging their friends, talking, sleeping, eating, generally not paying attention. I was nervous in the beginning, but soon I kind of sunk into it. I think the people got something out of it. I had printed copies of my powerpoint slides for everyone so they wouldn’t have to write everything all out. When I had finished I had a few people come up and ask some questions on the text and thank me for coming. Work at church has been going well, I think.

From that teaching, I had a adjunct professor at Biola ask me to help him out as a teacher’s assistant for some of his ESL classes. I have worked as a TA before, grading papers and all that. It’s not glamorous work, really it’s a pain in the ass. Grading 30 horrible 6-8 page papers when you need to write two 8 page papers of your own is not that fun. But, it is work in the educational system like I have been interested in doing in the long run.

I’ve contemplated working as a chaplain. As I get closer to finishing my MDiv, I have thought about the possibility of working as a hospital chaplain. I have never really done much work in this area, therefore I doubt my abilities a great deal. I see all the ways I’m unqualified, the major one is that the average age of the hospital chaplain in America is 60 years old. It’s hard to help people, or rather it’s hard to convince people you can help them when they are 35 years older than you. That’s just reality. I think a way that I can bypass all that is a hospital like CHOC, Children’s Hospital of Orange County. In a hospital devoted to children and teens, I am in a far better place than a 60 year old to help. Rachelle did clinicals at CHOC last semester and said their chaplain had quit and they were looking for another. The only problem is I need to finish my degree before they will hire me. I want to see if I’m even cut out for this kind of work, so I am going to ask our Care Pastor, in charge of weddings, funerals, chaplain for Whittier PD, etc., if I can tag along with him. Maybe get my feet wet a bit.

Dapper

I havn't posted any of my new shirt acquisitions in a while, and boy have there been acquisitions!

Biblical Disater















This is one of the shirts that made me love Threadless from the moment I found it. Unfortuneatly, the shirt was sold out and so I wasn't able to get it. Thank god for reprints, now this baby is mine. I can't wait to wear it to work.

No room for unicorns.

destroy NYC


















I'm not sure what drew me to this design. I like the precision in the drawing of the buildings mixed with doodle monsters that are destroying the city.

Bring her down boys.

Get Some Fresh Air













TV is a foul creation. I am ridiculed for playing video games by people who spend hours watching TV and freak out when they miss an episode. At least games have some sort of interation. Seriously though, I'm going to lay down some truth for everyone. Jack Bauer, and the whole show "24", is f-ing terrible. I know your reading this and saying as The Dude might, "Well that's, like, your opinion, man". No, the show is crap. But don't worry, everything else you watch on TV is complete and utter shite as well. Now your asking, "Well then what do you watch?" Any good TV show I like I have on dvd, there is only one show that I do really like to watch. Are you prepared for the... METALOCALYPSE!!!!!!

Confabulated Memory


















Most of the time my memory feels like this image. Remembering one thing, which brings up another, then eventually brings up a girl, which brings up other memories. I was unsure of this shirt at first, the image on the shirt is huge. A bit different than I usually get, maybe that's why I got it. Plus it was free.

A Preacher

Pardon my blog hiatus the last 2 weeks. I was writing and preparing sermons for the high school group the last 2 Sundays. Preaching isn’t something that I do often, actually I never do it. Two weeks ago was my very first time preaching outside of a classroom. I was nervous.

Why do I get nervous? This is something that I have spent considerable thought on. I hear that 90% of people have a fear of public speaking. I can understand that, no one likes being put on the spot. I used to think that I was just nervous to speak in front of any group of people.

Hold on, let me discuss what I mean when I say “nervous”. Before I would preach in class, I would feel physically ill from the day before to the day of speaking. This would include a giant stomachache as well as lower back pain; I feel terrible. I have told Rachelle that if I had to preach each week that I would have an ulcer. That is what I mean when I say nervous.

I found that my hypothesis about speaking in front of groups was completely false last year when I had to preach to only one person, my professor. Sure, you can make the argument that speaking in front of the prof. is just as stressful as an entire class but I don’t think that was the case for me. That was when I began to think about why I was so scared, if it wasn’t the number of people then what was it?

I know why I get scared now. I am afraid I will teach some falsehood; and by doing so lead a person into a wrong understanding of God. Do I think I will actually do this? I want to say no, but obviously there is a part of me that doesn’t agree.

The last two weeks have been a great validation for me. Stressful, painful, tiring… but still validating.

Hard Days Night

Sorry, I havn't been able to post in a while. I've been extremely busy this past week, but I don't have time right now to get into it. Posts will be coming soon, as soon as I'm not getting home at 11pm.

A Pox On Both Your Houses

A pox update for everyone who wants a peek at my hideously disfigured visage. The pictures really don't do it justice, but here they are. The first picture below is from yesterday and the latter is from today.Yesterday

Today

I made this comment on Eric's blog today and considering it was long enough to be its own blog, I thought I'd toss it in down here:

Ok, I can't really go to a movie right now being sick and all. I must admit though, I have been sorely tempted to go to "The Crappiest Place On Earth", Disneyland, and infect as many unsuspecting children as I can with the plague I carry. Oh, so you thought it would be a good idea to take your newborn to Disneyland before its had its 1 year vaccinations.... you chose poorly.

This may stem from a long held desire to be the first to bear a virus that would annihilate the population of the Earth as we know it and they name it after me. News Reporter says, "Sey is killing thousands of people by the day, and there looks to be no end in sight for Sey's rampage". Yea, that would be cool.

But I'm sure a more fitting disease would be some bacteria/virus that was persistent, annoying, and popped up when you least expected it... like an STD. "Oh man, Sey is making me all itchy and red spots are appearing! And I have an appointment with the Bobs' in 20 minutes... what do I do?" I would only ruin their social life and make them feel inadequate, sounds about right.

"The Tree" part 2

I thought I would add some more writing from my short stories, seeing how I'm pretty much stuck at home all the time right now. For those who didn't read the beginning, go ahead and click here.

Even in its sad state, far from the grandeur it had once basked in, it still loomed over me ominous and unforgiving. As I beheld it my instincts screamed at me, demanding that I bow in fear or cower and pay tribute. But my heart was not filled with fear, instead I felt a great sadness. I became strangely aware of the silence that engulfed the area surrounding the Tree. A morose feeling of loneliness that is felt when one living thing is cut off from all other life. I strained to hear just a simple chirp of a far off bird, the sad howling of a solitary wolf, or even the droning of a summer cicada. Nothing. Then I heard it, or rather I realized for the first time what had always been there. A sound, deep and billowing at once and high and screeching at others. I spun around in place trying to pinpoint the origin of the hideous melody and found that it came from all around me. It was the voice of the forest, unrecognizable in any linguistic form, yet I understood; the same way one can tell a couple in an adjacent room are fighting through the muffled voices. We trust the walls to hold the silent secret words that we never want strangers to hear, yet they can never hide the anger, lust, betrayal, and overall depravity in life. I heard weeping, like that of a mother agonizing over a child taken from this world too soon, from the old willows neighboring the dead river. Proud mocking coming from a grove of young upstart Oak trees, barely fifty rings of age. The Ash reveled in their new blooms and flaunted the Wisteria that hung from the branches in clusters of striking blue and purple that infested the trees like some beautiful disease. I was disgusted by it all yet something inside me demanded my gaze remain. Was it simply that beauty be recognized or the fear of offending a creator that could conceive of such things, I did not know.

Viruela De Pollo

So the results of my Mexico trip just keep getting better. The last day we were in Mexico, as we embarked on our long trip home, I began to feel sick. I was sure it was a cold, from all the freezing nights, early mornings, and non-stop activities. But when I got home I didn't feel congested, instead I felt achy, feverish, and had a headache. Great, I'm getting the flu; but it wasn't like any flu I had ever had. The symptoms came on gradually over days rather than hours and I didn't feel nauseated. I knew something was wrong with me but I had no idea what it was. Well, I found out today that I have Chicken pox. We were joking that I had some crazy form of Mexican Pollo Pox. Whatever the case, I was never infected with it as a child and now I'm going to pay for it.

Mexico: And All Things South Of The Border

It would take too long to describe all that happened in during my week in Mexico, so here are the highlights:

5 minutes into Tijuana I get pulled over by the Federales who try to shake me down for money, $125 to be exact. I was accused of going 100km/h when I was in fact going 60 km/h, the officers let me go shortly after they discovered I had a grand total of $15.

Driving through a muddy, rain soaked field on the way from the beach I hydroplane the rental car into a barbed wire fence.

Feliz ano nuevo! For New Years we went to "El Pollo Loco" (not the same one you're thinking of on the corner). It is a taco shack around Vincente Guerrero in which the 47 of us made the place burst at the seams. While there one of our students inadvertantly made friends with an old drunk man that wandered up. The man belligerently waved his left hand ordering tacos for the student while he squeezed him close with his right.

A fellow driver takes a bump too fast and rips the entire rear bumper off his rental car. We left the bumper in Mexico.

Getting chewed out by a Mormon missionary who said we were driving too fast through a neighborhood.

Driving through a military checkpoint on the way home I, of 8 cars, am the only one in which the driver is questioned and asked to get out of the car while the guard proceeds to knock on the plastic doors looking for contraband.

Taking 1 shower.

The Night Before Christmas...

And all through the house, not a creature was stirring except Ryan playing Wii like some demented mouse.

Merry Christmas everyone.

I've always been more of the bahumbug sort. Truth be told I much rather write about other things, so I will.

The Shirt Off My Back

The fine people at Threadless.com have been running a contest over the last few months; dangling a giant carrot in front of the noses is more like it. The Threadless 365 contest gives anybody who signs up a shot to win over 550 shirts (each shirt being $15= $8250.00) plus all longsleeve and sweatshirts which bumps the winnings to more than $10,000. Yea, not too shabby.

I wake this morning to a beautiful email that capped off finals week perfectly. I had been randomly selescted from thousands of people to be one of the top 10 finalists for the contest. If you are actually going to the links, I am the second name from the top, "packoutsandwich". That's right Jeff, Threadless got a big pack out sandwich. "Pack out sandwich" has been an inside joke between Jeff and I for going on 6 years now and this breathed new life into our sad expression.

The winners were chosen tonight through a video in which Santa unwrapped our names in presents and the last gift to be opened was the winner. Sadly, I did not win, but its hard to be upset over something you put absolutely no effort into. Ooh, I do get parting gifts though. I'm not sure what I will get but the 9 who were not picked were promised "great consolation prizes". I'm thinking we will probably get a free subscription to the 12 Club, which is a program where you get a special shirt each month and costs $200.

My interterm is starting off on the right foot! Now if you will excuse me, my Wii won't play itself.

Rybear Vs. La Mirada

The city of La Mirada is a tool. Actually, to be more specific a city is incapable of being a "tool", but like any institution it is only as great as those who run it. La Mirada is therefore a toolbox, housing the public officials, the "tools", within it's hollow tin chest. Now my vernacular is not by chance, that particular derogatory comment was specifically chosen due to it's unique description.

I'm just going to lay that out right from the start, whether or not you agree matters not because it is true and you would therefore be wrong. The logic is flawless.

My first run in with a La Mirada official was when I attempted to help Paul, David, Micah and the rest of the W. Nile Crew as "the man" attempted to bring them down. I must admit, the reason the official was called out in the first place was valid. It all began when a neighbor complained that the guys had put a couch on the roof, which they had done so they could read in the sun. I stand by my friends' decision. But when he got there he proceeded to ding them for having a gravel driveway, grass that was not all green, too many cars in the driveway, and the inability to park 2 cars in the garage. You read correctly, the city of La Mirada has written in it's bylaws that you must be able to park 2 cars in your garage at all times. Now, I understand that we all have a job to do and sometimes that forces us to be the bad guy. As the "Bad Guy" you can either accept this knowledge and try to be as cool as possible and hope the people are cool too or you can purposely be a jerk who quotes the letter of the law no matter how ridiculously mundane while upholding the integrity of his institution as if it were some unattainable goddess, a.k.a. a tool. This official was a tool of the highest caliber. As we tried to reason with him about the garage, which had actually been a home made sound proof room from the previous tenants who were in a band called Anthym. We asked him how many people he thought could actually park 2 full size cars in their garage. "I'd say 90%" was his response, meanwhile their neighbor had 2 jetskis on a trailer blocking entrance to his garage, also against the rules but you didn't see the official doing anything about it.

The drama moves closer to home. So, the citizens of my street, or at least 2/3 of them, saw fit to inact what La Mirada calls the "Preferential Parking Program" on our street. Under this system, only cars registered to people living on the street are able to receive a parking permit that enables them to leave a car parked curbside. Unless you have a permit you are unable to park on my street no matter what time or day. The campaign was spearheaded by old people who have nothing better to do and no one visiting them, soccer moms who have nothing better to do and no one visiting them, and pathetic broken men who cannot think for themselves and no one would ever want to visit. If people come over unexpectedly, they're pretty much boned unless they can fit in the driveway or I give them my parking pass, which by the way is against the rules. In order for visitors to park on the curb they must have a "Temporary Parking Pass" which you must go down to the Public Safety office to get and is valid for one day. The last time Rachelle went down there to get 15 parking passes the women complained that she was too busy to do them, bear in mind that all that is on these permits is my address, the date, and the officials signature. That's it. Those 15 passes took over 30 minutes to make, and Rachelle was told she needed to "call ahead next time if you want that many passes" because Rachelle had chosen "the busiest time of the day". All the lady was doing was answering phones.

This morning Rachelle had some friends from work come by for a big Christmas Breakfast Party; they're all night shift people so they do weird stuff like a party at breakfast. Saturday evening I went and got 15 passes which were no longer hand written. This time they wrote out one and then photocopied 15 which was fine by me. But, I thought her party was Sunday morning and told him the date was 12/10 rather than the 12/11 it actually was. We really didn't think anything of it, writing a "1" over the "0" believing it a waste of our time as well as Public Safety's for us to go back and make them photocopy more. Rachelle's friends begin to arrive and they place the photocopied permits in their cars while I blissfully slumber. But my bliss was short lived because Rachelle wakes me up to tell me that her friends are getting tickets. I go outside and the Public Safety officer tells me that one of the neighbors complained people were parking on the street because, like I said, my neighbors have no freaking life. The officers first complaint was that the permits were photocopies, which we said, "Yea that's what you gave us". To be honest the officer, as I have stated above, was inadvertantly the "bad guy" and was merely doing what he was told from his supervisor, which he called about the situation. I wasn't mad at him, I understoood he was a mere pawn in the game of deception La Mirada was playing. He apologized, saying he couldn't take back the five $40 tickets he had already written but that he wouldn't write anymore. I immediately went down to the Public Safety office and asked for 15 permits and to talk to whoever was in charge. As the girl began to write out a permit one of the others said, "Don't we just photocopy them, that's what I always do?" which made me chuckle. The boss came out, a short Asian woman who looked like she was ready for a fight. But I was not angry and remained polite yet forceful as I pointed out the logical flaws in their system of doing things in relation to their purpose/the purpose of the permits. I admitted up front that I had mistakenly said the wrong day and changed the date, having never used them on the 10th, because I thought it a waste of both our time and reources to come back for more photocopies. The whole time I spoke or tried to make a point she would slowly shake her head like she was saying "No" to everything I said. "By changing the day, you tampered witha binding legal document. Could you do that on your Federal Taxes"? In my head I was thinking please leave your straw man arguments out of this and I replied that the two are not remotely the same. When I said that I didn't want to waste their time she stopped me and said, "Oh no, its not a waste of time. We're open 12 hours each day to be here for you and the purpose of the permit parking is to serve you, so you should have come back and gotten more permits". I replied, "How exactly does issuing tickets to the people who live on the street, the very ones you say you are here for, a service to me"? She gave some BS answer and said there was nothing she could do and she would not rescind the tickets, thereby displaying the toolish symptoms we had spoken of earlier.

I, being the gracious person that I am, have decided that I really should take the Public Safety office up on the generous amount of time and resources they have allocated to serving me. Therefore, starting tomorrow I will be going to the Public Safety office everyday and obtaining the maximum amount of Temporary Parking Permits allowed (there appears to be no set number currently according to the city's bylaws).
The objective: To have the tickets cleared or allow the city of La Mirada to serve me, like they said they want to do, so much that I take up enough resources and man hours that it would have been cheaper to simply rescind the tickets in the first place.

One Day Left

I just got out of my Theology final and bbq'd it. Only studied for 45 minutes and was the 10th person done in a class of 60. As of tomorrow I will be finished with my Finals. The agenda tonight is to finish a paper and study for a test at noon. Funny thing is, I'm strangely optimistic about it. Normally in situations like this I would chalk it up to delerium, seeing how I have only slept 8 hours in the last 2 days. I guess I'm just happy to have another semester behind me and one step closer to graduation... but at what cost? Last night I was forced to use an unholy means in order to aid me in my studies: Starbucks. Yes I have fallen from grace indeed, allowing those vultures into my wallet and my very soul. And before you ask, it was a Peppermint Mocha.

End Of Semester

I thought I better post and say that I'm still alive. I've been busy trying to get done all the end of semester papers while working and staying up all night playing Halo 2 with High School kids.

I've also been extremely tired. I can't stay up to work on these papers late at night , after putting in a full day of work or classes, if my life depended on it. Gone are the days of the almighty all-nighter.

I haven't been able to talk to any of my friends. I haven't been able to play any of my new Wii, which I wanted to unveil properly on here but, alas, there is no time for it.

Next week is finals, then it will be over. I will be free.

To my friends... look to my coming on the first light of the fifth day, at dawn look to the east.

Graduation '07??

It's that wonderful time of the semester once again, pre-registration. I've been looking rather closely at my curriculum chart recently and it has come to my attention that I may be able to, with some finagling, graduate next semster. Finally. It's not that I have been taking longer than normal for my Masters Degree, just that I went right from my Undergrad into Grad. I don't know about you, but 7 years of anything, let alone papers, tests, summer school, 3 hour classes, etc., is too much. Having said that, I've been throwing around the idead of doing a Th.M because I'm a glutton for punishment. I've also thought about the D.Min but some schools like Talbot want you to have 3 years of ministry under your belt before they will accept you. I guess that's not a bad thing, otherwise you're giving someone a Doctorate who may never have spent day one in the ministry.

I mentioned that some "finagling" is necessary, let me explain. I am going to see about getting a class written off because I had it as an Undergrad but only got a "B" so it didn't transfer. I will have to take a class this interterm. Then I am trying to get into 14 units of classes for the Spring, two of which are Greek classes. I should add that 3 of these Spring classes are already closed, and the Interterm one may be as well. One other tricky matter is a 2 unit internship class that I can only take in the Fall, which means I have to get that figured out with my Academic Advisors. If by some chance all these things get done, then I will be graduating this Spring.

The unavoidable question arises, "What will you do after graduation"? Sadly, that is a question I am still unable to answer. I like working at the church, but will that turn from a part-time job to a full-time job? That's the million dollar question.

Wii Will Rock You

3 hours and 40 minutes until the Wii is finally released. I will be buying mine tonight at midnight from Toys R Us. Rejoice!

Unveiled!

The warranty was expiring on our A6 so we decided on a change of wheels. Introducing the newest member of the household, the 2007 Audi A4 2.0T. Yes, it's bright red. Quite a change from the sleek, but melancholy, black beauty the A6 was... may she rest in peace.

Here in my car
I feel safest of all
I can lock all my doors
It's the only way to live
In cars

Here in my car
I can only receive
I can listen to you
It keeps me stable for days

In carsHere in my car

The image breaks down
Will you visit me please
If I open my door
In cars

Here in my car
I know I've started to think
About leaving tonight
Although nothing seems right
In cars

I know I've started to think
I know I've started to think

"Cars" by Gary Numan

Well What Do We Have Here?

There's nothing quite like tucking two beautiful cars in for the night in their cozy garage, while the truck stays out on the curb. I guess cars are a bit like animals, or more specifically pets. We give them names, which ought to always adhere to the unwritten rule that states a car must retain the first letter of either the make or model e.g. "Pete Porsche" or "Cindy Civic". Jeff broke the rules when he named his Toyota Camry, "Jen". Then you have the inside pets and the outside pets. My 914 has always stayed inside, it's barely seen the light of day. On the other hand, my Tacoma has spent the majority of it's short life outside due the fact that it... well... it's a truck!

The new pet.
What in the world is this? And in red??

Mmmmmmmmmm... "Turbo" is a word I like to see when I 'm looking at the engine.

Duh da, duh da, duh da.... she's a shark. *Rawr*. Yea that's right, the shark said, "Rawr." Got a problem with that??

More to come...

1 Star: The Bible

I have had a request for the next 1 Star Classic, the #1 bestselling book of all time, The Bible. Although from many of these reviews, you may be wondering how it got that way.

The Holy Bible

"This is the worst book I've picked up since Christopher Castile's 'Being You is Most Definitely Cool'."

"I think we all can safely say that this book has been pretty much debunked by Science. I would put the Bible on the same shelf as books like 'The Odyssey'. Basically, fictional tales told by primitive men in a primitive time in human history."

"I find the plot hard to follow, the writing style is pretty rough and the characters lack emotional depth. God turns out to be a pretty mean guy when kicks Adam and Eve out of the garden for simply eating an apple and then tries to trick Abraham into killing his son ... just kidding! He does do a good job of flooding the earth and killing most everyone which is kind of cool, but again, kind of mean. The new testament stuff is better ... Jesus is a pretty cool dude with a good message about loving people and turning the other check and all that ... but it seems to get lost in translation somewhere in the modern world."

"its thickness, its weight, and its sexy black imitation leather covering makes this book an ideal doorstopper. Very useful."

"I feel that this book started out well but lacked something of an ending. The writing styles change intermittedly and seem to lack something of a finesse, blatantly stating things that cannot be taken literally or figuratively well enough to purvey a superior understanding of the text. I found it about as entertaining as flipping through a T.V. guide but not owning a T.V. seeing all the shows that you could be watching explained in a summerized detail that never quite lets you know what it's really all about. A true literary flop."

"Reading the reviews of this bible has inspired me to contribute.
Leviticus 25:17 - 'Thou shalt wear a shirt woven of two type of cloth'
Pure Cotton is the only way. All praise Saville Row."

"God sure sounds unhappy. Maybe he should seek professional help for his anger. Hell, it worked for me."

"This book is in very poor taste. Between the rape, torture, murder, mass murder, and latent themes of homophobia this book is not for the faint of heart. Only the mad or abusive would allow a child anywhere near this, it would scar them for life."

"Frankly, I was disapointed. I expected more from God. Definetly not his best work."

1 Star: To Kill A Mockingbird

This may upset some folks I know. There was a lot of unhappy people at Amazon, but it seems the "haters" came to a general consensus in their reviews. It was boring! My own personal comments will be denoted in red, just like Jesus. And as always, the reviews are cited as posted on Amazon, in all their grammatical glory.

To Kill A Mockingbird

"I was completely bored reading this book. A court case is hardly a thrilling idea."
Don't tell that to John Grisham.

"Once you have read one book like this one, you have read them all. A classic american piece of caca"

"Say what you will, but this never picks up. It starts out with Scout talking about how her brother once broke his arm. Who cares? The book's most exiting part is extremely confusing, and don't tell me I'm stupid; I have an IQ of 140. I personally prefer books that have something called action, such as Michael Chricton or Stephen King novels."
Yes, of course, the genius doesn't understand the most "exiting" part of the book. Big surprise.

"I was assigned this book for a reading assignment and me and the guy who sat next to me seemed to be the only ones who hated the book out of the whole class and we sit right infront of the teachers desk so we gave her heck all day! lol anyway... I seriously dislike this book!"
When I read this I can picture some of the high school kids I work with actually saying it... quite disturbing.

Well if this is a classic then so could the Charlies Angel's movies. All the book consists of is a middle-class family in the south with a few weird neighbors. I mean come on. Who really cares about a little girl that goes around the neighborhood doing things like spying on her albino neighbor. If that makes a book a classic, shame on you. Atticus against all odds is always fair and never makes anyone mad. He deals with all disputes perfectly. A wee bit too good to be true. Don't you think? Finishing this book felt like the equivalent of fighting in World War II with nothing but an army of G.I. Joes. If you have been given this book as a present I give you my deepest condolences."

"this book is to long and there arent eny car chases or bombs going off and i wuz bored and it would make a lowsy video game."
This has got to be a joke, but still priceless.

It is a very interesting and great book!!!!! I expecially liked how they talked of people standing up for what is right!! NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This suit is NOT black. That was for you, Eric.

"This book is very nasty. It depicts scenes I would not care to see if I was being PAID. It's just a sick book. Dont read it, kids"

"THIS BOOK IS BORING!There's no other word to describe it.I just wasen't interested in this book.And they call this a "timeless classic"!Bah,humbug!If I had a cookie for every time I heard that, I'd be a very fat kid!"

"In our most humble opinion we think this book could use some work. Half the book dose not appeal to the readers eye, but on the other hand the other half of the book is completely different from the first half. This is a story that may have touched the hearts of some, but for the many that don't understand it. We agree with them because it doesn't make any sence to us."
Let me see if I got this right. So half the book didn't "appeal to the readers eye", and then you are upset that the second half is completely different?

"I'm sorry everyone. I don't see why this book is so fabeulos. I would give it a zero. I find no point in writing a book about segregation, there's no way of making it into an enjoyable book. And yes i am toataly against segragation. Thanks to all my friendswho had to tourchure threw reading this disgrace and supporting me in not likeing the book. By the way, DO NOT BUY, because if i find it in your house i won't think to kindly of you."
I think he secretly is a fan of segregation and "tourchure".